The Afternoon of Life

The events surrounding what happened with my friend have left me feeling numb and sick.   I keep playing over the "what if(s)".   "What if" we'd been in bed and missed the cry for help?   "What if" they'd accomplished what they started?   "What if" we'd rejected them long ago like so many have done?   If the answer to any of those questions had been different, I might have awakened yesterday only to hear that my friend was gone.   And having been involved in the situation, I know the depth of that desire to be gone.   And it makes me feel ill.   How sick is this world?   How cruel do people have to be?   As someone who's has dealt with bullying and rejection as a child...as someone who has never felt like she "fit in"...all the pain came back.   Stuff I thought I'd let go of long ago has apparently just been sitting here festering...a gaping wound. It's like all of the sudden their pain became mine...and wow how

At 2:00 this morning I began a conversation with a young man on FB...a young man who has been a friend of our family for a long time.  A young man who has made a lifetime of mistakes in 23 years...over and over and over again.  He was trying to commit suicide.  Dan brought his posts to my attention and I was able to engage him in conversation.  I was  back and forth with 9-1-1 because we couldn't figure out where he was.  His writing became almost incoherent after about an hour and a half and I was so frightened that we were going to lose him.  I continued to beg him for an address...but then I realized I needed to make sure he was prepared to meet his Maker. I asked him "do you know Jesus" and he answered, "only because of you".  I sat back in my chair a little stunned...he knew Jesus only because we'd been a part of his life.  And those words have continued to haunt me.  How many people know who Jesus is because of one person or family in their life?