Another Phone Call...Another Chapter

The phone rings…and life changes.  It could be something insignificant…an appointment reminder…a politician looking for a donation.  It could be something a little more significant…a child or grandchild is ill…a friend is going through a hard time.  And then there are the life-changer phone calls that turn your world upside down.  A friend has died unexpectedly…a parent is having a biopsy.  Those phone calls make you pause…make you search your soul.  Those are the phone calls that send the questions spinning through your mind. 

I’ve had those phone calls in my lifetime…too many of them, I want to think.  I know God is working on me and in me and doing things to bring me in line with what He requires of me so that He can give me the blessings He wants to pour out on me.  I’m really clear about that.  I’ve had to much experience to not understand that.  I’ve wondered often if I create some of the crises in my life that result in those phone calls… and the truth is that I know I have.  I’ve made decisions that have consequences…and some of those consequences have been so difficult to face. 

Today I had a phone call.  My morning was going somewhat normally…as normally as it could be considering all that I’ve been through.  Someone posted something recently on Facebook that looking back holds us back … that we have to look forward to move forward.  My phone call today has me looking back and forward.  Back at poor choices I’ve made…back at how I chose who to believe and not believe…back at my stubbornness and hard-headedness.  Funny, our pastor preached Sunday and shared a cyclical thing that takes place in our lives…and I’ve really been letting my heart ponder this since Sunday because this made sense.

The thing we love à influences the way we think (transforms our mind) à shapes our priorities (crucified to world) à influences our actions (we put on and put off choices) à develops a deeper relation à and we’re back to the thing we love.  The Scriptures encourage us to put our minds on Christ…to die to self.  I’ve really been searching my heart.  Is God the One I love most?  Or do I let other things influence me more than I let God influence me?

Today’s phone called revealed a truth in my life that I’ve known but denied for a long, long time.  I love food.  Food has transformed my mind, shaped my priorities, influenced my actions…and I’ve developed a deeper relationship with food.  The phone call?  From my doctor…words like diabetes and liver function and life-changing behaviors that I will have to pay attention to.  You see…I didn’t believe all the health reports that air nightly on the news.  I didn’t believe my mother when she said, “You’ll have diabetes if you keep eating like this.”  I didn’t believe Scripture verses about gluttony.  Food was an instant gratifier…and some foods gratify much more than others.  Icky, sticky sweets… meats covered in breading and fried…breads…chips…cakes…cookies…milk shakes.  These are the staples in my diet.  They have been since high school…when I first gained an excessive amount of weight.  I have been obese for over 20 years now…and the only time I was concerned about it was when I was diagnosed with cancer.  I felt like I deserved cancer…I was eating all the stuff they say you should not eat.  Cancer took away 80 lbs from my body…and comfort food put back about 50 of them. 

I will give myself credit for one thing.  I spoke to my doctor in July and said when I return from Louisiana I want to get serious about weight loss.  I returned and made that appointment to see my doctor and had blood work done early last week.  It was that blood work that prompted this morning’s phone call.  I go for more blood work tomorrow and a follow-up visit with my doctor on Friday to come up with a plan of attack for coping with yet another life-changing disease…sigh.  But at least I was taking a first step and this isn’t the first step…this is just the motivator to complete what in my heart I already knew I needed to do.

I guess when we’re hard-headed and stubborn and obnoxious, God will go to whatever extreme is needed to get our attention.  He’s got mine!  I’ve not told anyone about this phone call yet…my family members will read it here…my friends will read it here.  But I will again ask for prayers (while apologizing and asking forgiveness from all of you for getting myself into this mess and asking you to pray me out of it).  I will also ask for accountability.  If you talk to me, ask me how I’m doing and don’t accept, “Okay.”  Push me…prod me…goad me…encourage me…uplift me.  But most of all…pray for me.  I know the power of prayer in my life.  I want to live…I want to live healthy…I want to exemplify Christ in my body…not just my heart, mind and soul. 

Thank you for your prayers.