Now What?

Recently I’ve been meeting with a “life coach”.   I’ve been at a crossroads in my life, precipitated by the deaths of my father and mother and leaving Enchante, the dinner theatre troupe I traveled with for several years.  My children have all left home and started their own families.  And somewhere in the middle of all of this I’ve felt like I lost myself.  I lost several important “roles” in my life…daughter, full-time mother, professional accompanist.  Stripping away the layers of the roles I’ve been playing, I was suddenly left with just me!  The me that has been flawed and broken and sad and lonely.  The me that found security in the knowledge that I could always find the answers to my questions just a phone call away.  The me that seems to mess up everything I try do correctly.  After months of mourning…mourning not just the loss of my parents but the loss of the me with which I had grown comfortably familiar…I came to the crossroads of Now Street and What Avenue.  Now what?

Life changes can pull the rug out from under us if we choose to dwell on the painful or the negative.  And it’s very easy to do exactly that.  Kick-starting one’s self out of the doldrums isn’t easy.  And looking for direction without a map or GPS is pretty hopeless.  So I decided I needed help.  Counseling wasn’t what I needed.  I needed someone who could help me take all my life lessons, all my experiences, all my desires and all my feelings and failures and somehow make something out of a bunch of almost nothings.

God has blessed me with the counsel of a very wise man.  This man has not only taken me under wing to coach me, but has allowed me to begin training to coach others should the opportunity arise.  And I can’t tell you how perfectly God has answered a recent prayer.  I had begun to realize that I lack the “tact” or “tone” to relay my messages properly.  My intentions seem to somehow always get lost because my tone implies just the opposite.  Learning to ask questions in a way that will allow others to share without feeling attacked or like they need to put up walls of defense should help me with this problem. 

The process of searching for the “new and improved” me has really had my thinker thinking in the last few weeks.  Processing everything is challenging.  Writing goals that can be met has proved to be quite a task.  I struggle at times…and then other times I shoot along without a pause.  I’m studying who I am and who I believe God wants me to be…and how to get there.

I recently found myself drawn to a word I remember from my college days…”facilitate”…and went looking for some meaning in the word.  I love the idea of becoming a facilitator:  one who makes things easier or less difficult for others… one who helps another move forward or assists in the progress of that person.  Synonyms include:  relieve – ease – alleviate – simplify – lighten.

With a play on “rhyming” words, I wanted to share the things I could do as a facilitator:

·         Accentuate the gifts and leading of Christ in one’s life

·         Accommodate the needs and desires in preparing for a life call

·         Alleviate confusion and help clarify God’s path ahead

·         Anticipate the good works that God will accomplish

·         Appreciate the strengths that God has given

·         Assimilate information that lines up with God’s Word

·         Authenticate feelings and dreams and desires that will please God

·         Collaborate for best results and outcomes for the Kingdom

·         Communicate clearly the message of Christ

·         Cooperate with others to accomplish Kingdom work

·         Corroborate to confirm that an individual’s plans are God’s plan for their life

·         Disseminate information that challenges others to grow closer to God

·         Elaborate the details so that an overall plan can be achieved

·         Eliminate any misgivings or fears so that great things can be accomplished

·         Enumerate the blessings of God

·         Evaluate situations to ensure one is following God’s direction

·         Extrapolate God’s will from life signs and experiences

·         Illuminate the path with God’s light and His Word

·         Incorporate the wisdom of many for successful outcome

·         Initiate a journey that will bring one closer to God

·         Interpolate information that gives one a new way to see things

·         Investigate all channels for worshiping and pleasing God

·         Invigorate one to a new energy, verve and vigor for serving God

·         Negotiate new ideas and compromise for reaching the lost

·         Orientate new family to God’s Kingdom and His truths

·         Participate in the growth and discipleship of others

·         Perpetuate God’s Word for future generations

·         Reciprocate God’s goodness in my life by sharing it with others

·         Regenerate the fire to burn bright and show others The Way

·         Reiterate God’s truths

·         Rejuvenate and revive first loves

·         Substantiate the truths of God with practical applications

As you can see, a “facilitator” has an opportunity to disciple others and challenge them to grow closer to God…and this is the desire of my heart.  God has proved so faithful in my life, and I want the rest of my life to be a testimony of His continued work in me.  I’m not sure how I make this all about Him, but I know I must continue to die to self…to my own worldly desires and dreams…and start desiring what He desires for me and dreams for me.  I love that His imagination is above and beyond anything I could ever dream up. 

I ask that you pray for me as I continue on this path of discovery.  There’s so much to learn (at least I love learning).  Then I have to apply it to my life.  That’s where the rubber hits the road.  And that’s the part that will prove most challenging.  Change is not easy, but embracing change can help to remove some of the sting.  I want to rest in His leading and know that I’m safe in the center of His will.

And if I can do anything to help anyone reading this, please let me know.  I’d love to “facilitate” and help you along your path too!